I roll onto my back. My head is throbbing. All I can hear is beeping and the distant sound of phones ringing, people talking, maybe nurses,  and water trickling, almost like a little fountain- it was only slightly relaxing, I later learned it was a part of the ventilater machine. I’m staring at the ceiling. I wish I could fall asleep. I roll over. My am disappears. I can’t feel anything on the left side of my body. 

instant panic.

WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM?

WHY CAN’T I FEEL ANYTHING?

WHERE DID IT GO?

I sit up as quickly as my tired body could sit. I begin sifting through the layers of blankets. Still panicking, I find a warm, stick nestled underneath me. WHAT IN GOD’S NAME IS THIS? Did the nurses pay some sort of Halloween prank on me? Yes, they did. It was a cruel prank. I pick up the stick. it’s a weird, and very realistic fake arm toy.

What the actual hell is this? 

I called my nurse, inspecting the toy, only to discover it’s attached to me and has MY tattoos on it.

My nurse, Kahlo runs in.

“I HAVE AN ARM!!!!!!!” I’m crying, holding my left arm.

Kahlo laughs outloud, probably relieved it wasn’t a more serious call.

Yes you do! You should name it, just so you don’t forget about it.

There are so many directions one could go when naming an arm. I stared thinking….

hmmm… Armando? armmmmmm…. Marrrrrrrrr….. arm backwards is Mar, my nam starts with a C! together, we’re Marc! what a team.

“I’ll think I’ll name him, Marc.”